We’ve worked at keeping track of those precious kid conversations over the years- but it’s hard to take the time. Twitter has made it even easier because I can jot down the smaller tidbits that would otherwise get lost. Whenever I have a moment, I sit down at the computer, or my phone, and quickly send an OH tweet. For the twitter newbies, you can recognize these by the OH (standing for overheard) at the start of the tweet.
Carter’s overheard tweets cover the gamut of educational to just plain crazy. Here are a few of my favorites.
Scientific:
“But Archie, a mosquito is so small it’d be dead before it finished sucking all your blood. There’s really no reason to be afraid of it.”
Negotiating:
“Even though we’ve seceded, since we live so close could you help us out and hand us a couple of spoons?”
(In response to me telling him it’s time to come inside) “It can’t be! I haven’t seized the day yet!”
“Mom? Do we have any rat poison? We need it to add an element of death.”
“You could grant me $50 or alternatively you could be the subject of a comic strip called ‘mindless mama.”
Speculative:
“It’s not likely I’ll be a competitive world class swimmer or diver. Much more likely I’ll be a noted musician.”
“Wouldn’t it be funny if someone’s last words were ‘you have mustard on your chin?'”
Unusual declarations:
“I’m playing a blues oboe solo in honor of Dad. At least it’s a slightly sad oboe solo. I don’t really know how to play the blues yet.”
“Mom, don’t bake this, it’s got gunpowder in it.”
“I want to make a movie called ‘movies’ about a movie company that makes nc-17 movies targeted for 6 yr olds.”
Archie is younger, and his reflect a different developmental stage, although there are certainly similarities.
There are the painfully sweet:
“Mama, I’m still your sweet little man- only now I look bald.” (After a haircut)
“You’re so dumb mom,” (shocked silence) “I mean, funny dumb, Mom- the good kind.”
The unexpected:
(Speaking as his Bionicle) “You shall feel my BATH!!”
“Can I play with Yeltsin? He’s funny and his head comes off.”
“Mom? if we get a parrot, can we make a pirate ship?”
The “I’m developing people skills” category:
(In response to Carter calling me the MEANEST PERSON IN THE WORLD) “Actually, Dad is a little meaner.” (note: later that day he told Dad he was just saying that to make me feel better.)
“I feel like he punched me in the face. He punched me in the back, but it felt like being punched in the face.”
“He used to be my brother, but now he’s dead, and I don’t like dead people, so he’s not my brother now.”
6 replies on “Overheard on Twitter”
So freakin’ adorable, I cannot stay grumpy right now at this very moment. Excellent.
How old are Archie & Carter? In human years, of course.
That of course assumes they are human. Sometimes I wonder …
Carter is 8 going on 20, and Archie is almost 5 going on Carter.
Gotcha. I have a 14yo daughter and a 5yo son. Sometimes I get interesting comments from my son, but nothing nearly as awesome as what your boys say. Must say something about their environment. Something good, of course.
You should check-out http://wasoverheard.com/ it’s a site some friends and I came up with at SXSW’08 this year. Really fun execution and functionality surrounding all those weird things we overhear people say.
Jealous of the SXSW trip. Timing and finances haven’t been good for me the past couple years, but it is one conference I would love to attend every year.
Those are some of the best sayings from kids I’ve ever heard/read. They’re really quite brilliant. 🙂